Awwww, look at him. Who wouldn't want to help that little alien get home? He's not here to hurt anyone. He just wants to eat your Reese's Pieces and touch your children. Wait a minute. Does anyone know how old this alien is? Or what he did on his home planet that caused to him to make a break for it and crash land on earth? For all we know, he could be some kind of pedophilic space fugitive. Look...look there on the cover...yeah, you can see it in his eyes. This guy makes me sick. And it's for that reason, and that reason alone that all I can say to this game is a giant "fuck you...fuck, fucking you". Oh, wait, I forgot, the reason I am saying that is because this game completely sucks. I'm going to sum up the contents for you very quickly and then show you a picture of the game. Then I am done. I don't even want to write about this game. Basically, you crash land on earth...remember? Now you have to get home. But, wait, what's this, Earth is a series of holes, some of which have junk hidden in them. Oh, well then, you'd better get wandering and falling into those holes. Yup, that's it. E.T. falls into holes. Sometimes a bad guy comes and captures you and hauls you off to jail, or the Capitol Building or something like that. Don't worry, though, you can just walk out and continue to fall in holes. Ok, here's a screen shot from the game so you can see what I'm talking about. I don't want to say anymore. Except, did I say "fuck you E.T."? I did? Oh, Ok.
I'll put up a little poll soon so that my faithful readers can vote on which game I review next (I know you're all waiting patiently for each of these entries). Stay tuned.
Awwww, look at him. Who wouldn't want to help that little alien get home? He's not here to hurt anyone. He just wants to eat your Reese's Pieces and touch your children. Wait a minute. Does anyone know how old this alien is? Or what he did on his home planet that caused to him to make a break for it and crash land on earth? For all we know, he could be some kind of pedophilic space fugitive. Look...look there on the cover...yeah, you can see it in his eyes. This guy makes me sick. And it's for that reason, and that reason alone that all I can say to this game is a giant "fuck you...fuck, fucking you". Oh, wait, I forgot, the reason I am saying that is because this game completely sucks. I'm going to sum up the contents for you very quickly and then show you a picture of the game. Then I am done. I don't even want to write about this game. Basically, you crash land on earth...remember? Now you have to get home. But, wait, what's this, Earth is a series of holes, some of which have junk hidden in them. Oh, well then, you'd better get wandering and falling into those holes. Yup, that's it. E.T. falls into holes. Sometimes a bad guy comes and captures you and hauls you off to jail, or the Capitol Building or something like that. Don't worry, though, you can just walk out and continue to fall in holes. Ok, here's a screen shot from the game so you can see what I'm talking about. I don't want to say anymore. Except, did I say "fuck you E.T."? I did? Oh, Ok.
I'll put up a little poll soon so that my faithful readers can vote on which game I review next (I know you're all waiting patiently for each of these entries). Stay tuned. 
Posts
E.T. as a pedophile. Just think of the problems he caused with Reese's Pieces once he got back to his home planet.
ReplyDeleteThis blog is my go-to spot for when I just need a good cry.
ReplyDeleteDo you still fish? Or ever see the out of doors?
This blog makes me yawny.
ReplyDeleteNow I'm concerned your Atari is no longer working.
ReplyDelete